My kickboxing boudoir session
When the girls and I first started talking about doing these sessions, one of the first things that came up is that not one of us have done a boudoir session ourselves. It really didn't make much sense that we were asking women to want to do these sessions, when we hadn't done a session either. We all agreed at that point, that each one of us needed to do a session.
Here's the thing about me. I don't consider myself a sexy person by any means. I'm a Mom, and let's face it, there's not much glamour behind motherhood. Most days I'm lucky to take a 5 second shower without one of my kids walking in on me. Forget actually doing my hair and make-up everyday, that just doesn't happen. There's a solid chance any outfit I wear will end up with snot, food or dog hair on it at some point in the day. That's just how my life is, it's pretty hard to feel sexy at the end of my day. So how was I going to muster up enough 'sexiness' to do my own session? Queue kickboxing themed session.
Any one that knows me, knows I'm kind of obsessed with kickboxing. I've kickboxed for a little over 10 years now and I love it. It is the one thing that I truly do for me and no one else. And, I guess to put it in a word, it makes me feel sexy. It's such a powerful workout and there's so many things I've gained since I started kickboxing and confidence is one of those things. It only made sense to me, to do a boudoir session that was kickboxing themed.
So, there I was in my dirty garage, doing a kickboxing themed boudoir session. When my session first started, it was easy, because I was just kickboxing. I wanted the session to be hard and tough to start, to really capture what I do when I kickbox. It wasn't until the second half of my session that I started feeling awkward and nervous. I ask women to do this for their sessions, so what was my problem? It was right there at the back of my mind the whole time, my insecurities with my own body. I'm a Mom. I have 4 beautiful kids. And I have stretch marks from bearing those 4 beautiful kids.
I have come to accept the marks on my body from carrying my kids. Most Moms carry these same marks. There's some very lucky Moms that don't, and I fully admit to how much I envy them. Don't misunderstand me, I would never take away carrying my kids and receiving those marks. I would do it a million times again to have my children. It's why I've accepted it. It's physical proof of this miraculous and amazing thing a woman's body can do. It really is a beautiful thing what our bodies are capable of ladies. Still, knowing and telling myself all of this, the insecurities are there.
I could have edited my stretch marks out. But this was my opportunity to speak to every woman out there, and have it come from a real place. I understand how insecurities can stop you from doing a session. I understand that you think you aren't pretty enough, or skinny enough, or in shape enough to do a session. Let me say this, as nervous as I was about doing my own session and posting them for the world to see, I'm glad that I did. These photos may not make sense to someone else, but they made me feel beautiful and powerful. We are all beautiful in our own way. We are imperfectly perfect.
If you take anything from this post, my hope is it's this. These sessions can be anything you want them to be. Make this session about you, about what makes you feel beautiful. And don't let your own insecurities stop you from doing a session, or anything for that matter. You have one life. You ARE beautiful. Your age, size, imperfections do not change that.
I also wanted to say a big thank you to Cassandra Watterson for not only taking the pictures, but also being so patient with me :)
Of course those pics are beautiful, as are you on the inside and out. Thanks for posting these, you have got me pumped for
My session next month.
I think it is wonderful you put those pictures on here. You are true to yourself. Beautiful!
Beautiful, just like I knew they would be! What you said was,also,very beautiful and stated the truth matter of fact. I'm very proud of you and your talents!!
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